Shutting the doors to the dragon & his demon offspring.

I wholeheartedly apologize for my recent abrupt and unannounced hiatus. For those of you who may be wondering, where the fuck was she? I have been meandering about amidst the future Sylvia Plaths of the world practicing the value of serenity, learning that vulnerability is not only a sign of humanness, but strength, etcetera, etcetera; somewhere where people who frown too often become convinced that happiness is not a sign of weakness. A place that forces people who haven't been themselves for quite some time to awaken from their dreamy facade and swallow the nightmare, whole. Anyways, enough of that sappy personal shit no one gives a damn about.

Do you even realize what you're saying? Do you even care?

Can your parents look at you without feeling they have completely failed you? Do your enlightened friends tip-toe around the subject, as if you’re now a piece of glass that may shatter at the slightest touch? Is there a thick brick wall between you and the world so that no matter what you say, it’s always a foreign language?

Did it steal your childhood innocence away in a matter of minutes? Did a car drive by and not even stop? When girls cackle about their “first time” and “OMG, my V-Card” do they fail to see the irony when you spit, “I still can’t ride a bicycle.”

Do you hate yourself for thinking somehow it was your fault? Do you sometimes feel guilty as if you made the wrong decision only to feel guiltier for ever blaming yourself? Do the scars remain as permanent physical evidence of the tragic endeavor? Did he laugh as you squirmed under the wide pan of his stomach?

Was it literally stolen from you? Is your body nothing but a source of pain? Are their particular movements, hues, sounds, anything that can send the whole act replaying in your mind? Do certain scenes spin around and around in your mind like a carousel? Does the spinning never stop? Are you always always always dizzy with memories? Do you play music so fucking loud when you’re in the shower so no one can hear you screaming? Do you abrade your own flesh until you bleed in the thought that maybe; just maybe, you can somehow bleed it all away? Is their a constant film of disgust daubed about your being? Are you in a perpetual fight with your body because you feel like you have failed it? Are you obligated to tell anyone who touches you, both now and in the future?

Oh, what’s that? Yeah, I didn’t think so. I guess your finals didn’t “rape” you. I suppose your team’s big lost was not equivalent to being “raped.” When your teacher accidently bumps into you in the hallway he is not “practically raping” you. Rape is not an expression or hyperbole, it actually exists and happens, to real people, all the time.

Bella, the worst thing for the advancement of women this decade.

Alright, alright perhaps America's Twilight craze has come to an end, but that does not excuse the fact that the series has sold more than 85 million copies worldwide or occupied the top of USA Today's bestseller list for the entire year of 2008.

Unlike other phenomenon book series, Meyer's series does not appeal to a large demographic. If you don't believe me, how many teenage boys or college grads do you know who'd wear merchandise stamped with sayings such as "I (heart) Jacob" or "Team Edward"? Within Meyer's stories, the female characters are portrayed as mere girls. They're naive and codependent. They attend strictly all girl slumber parties. However, the male characters, with their alluring muscles, courage, and testosterone-driven male aggression are clearly much more than boys; they're men. Not surprisingly, Jacob and Edward's characters drive the story from beginning to end. With whom will Bella live happily ever after? Oh, the agony of anticipation! 

So, what's the appeal of such a series? In a culture where oral sex is as casual as a high five and one night stands are preferred over commitment Bella's chastity and dependence on the men in her life reads as romantic in comparison. Young female readers drool over those handsome men and are not threatened by Bella, who instead of being class president or the next Mila Kunis, is an simple yet relatable girl who occasionally nibbles on Pop-Tarts.

Everyone loves a sappy romance story.

Darling Daughters.

I sincerely hope my future daughters engage in premarital sex. If one hasn't explored their own pleasure and desire or begun to understand their body's responses than they aren't ready for marriage. If you can't express your needs, say no when you need to, or comprehend the value of reciprocity, than you're not ready for marriage. If you have never experienced true intimacy how can you love someone enough for a successful marriage? 

Choice is the power of feminism.

“It’s so funny that Sarah is a feminist because she dresses like such a slut.”

What would be truly ironic is if, as a feminist, I allowed others to dictate what I chose to put on my body. Feminists, simply put, are people who believe in equality between people of all sexual identities. Thus, as people, feminists come in all the variations that people come in. We are the last people to be found guilty of slut shaming. What one wears or does not wear on his or her body is not a direct reflection on his or her sexual history, and secondly, one’s sexual history does not grant them slut status.

Not that I should feel any obligation or pressure to defend myself, but even from a conservative stand point, I do not dress provocatively. A typical Sarah outfit consists of some 1990's wannabe maxiskirt / lil' frock, opaque black tights, vegan leather or denim jacket, and Creepers.

Oftentimes, men thrust the term “slut” upon women who emit some sort of sexual prowess or cause them to feel some sort of sexual desire. I can’t control what your mind turns to when you look at me, nor would I let that have any influence over how I dress. I can however exert my freedom and wear whatever I want.

As I became enlightened about the above comment I was instantly reminded of the second wave's sensible show debate. Uhh, hello? It's 2012. Are people still so ignorant that they think feminists do not wear make-up and high heels? Have we, as a society, still not moved passed the stereotype that all feminists are fugly butches forced into a life of angsty misery because no guys want to be with them? 

"Feminism is not a dirty word. It does not mean you hate men, it does not mean you hate girls that have nice legs and a tan, and it does not mean you are a 'bitch' or 'dyke' ; it means you believe in equality." - Kate Nash

Dasani Water Bottle Locker Collections

Are the students who purchase plastic water bottles everyday at school literally looking to throw money away or are they truly that stupid? God forbid these brats go a day without totting around their Dasani water bottles and visit the drinking fountain about three meters to their left. Adding to my irritation, rarely do these kids even finish their overpriced bottled water. Instead, they let them pile up and grow into a collection in their school lockers. Once there is no possible way to fit both the ever-growing collection and textbooks in their lockers, they simply pour the water into the drinking fountain and toss the recyclable into a trash receptacle.

There are children who will die never seeing, let alone drinking clean water. As you mindlessly pour your designer eau down the drain of the fountains you're too cool to be seen using dehydration is robbing people of their precious lives. Oh pardon me, are you too preoccupied maintaining your collection to recycle? Please note that the recycle bins are located approximately two feet east of all trash receptacles.

I look forward to the day these children get cut off from their parents and GASP!...have to support themselves.

Lesbian Chic.

To what extent is the increase in media portrayals of lesbians a representation of increased cultural acceptance? We must ask ourselves if it is nothing more than another show to tickle the desires of heterosexual men. MTV's reality shows have no problem with bisexual bachelorettes and showing a little girl on girl action, but they are yet to host a bisexual bachelor. Remember, Katy Perry broke onto the music scene in 2008 with her single, "I Kissed A Girl." Is the increase in females sexually experimenting with other females a genuine expression of their sexuality and a reflection of an increased comfort regarding homosexuality, or are females just tapping onto a new kinky way to arouse men?

The Big Flavor Debate.

In 2009, the U.S. government banned flavored cigarettes (with the exception of menthol) on the grounds of disguising tobacco as mere innocuous candy to children. Why then, are flavored condoms still legal? Do they not downplay the riskiness and seriousness of oral sex? Seeing as one cannot purchase cigarettes until the age of eighteen I am struggling to understand how this law protects children. By passing this law, legislation is openly acknowledging that a large percentage of smokers are underage, or illegally using tobacco. On the other hand, thanks to the bomb ass work of William R. Baird, Jr. condoms are legal to purchase at any age and it is actually illegal for store clerks to refuse to sell them to minors. So, if we apply the same line of logic used to ban flavored cigarettes to condoms, can we credit flavored condoms as something marketed towards children who are too young to be making decisions regarding sexual behavior?

My Pussy Is Not A "Pussy."

I'm wholeheartedly confused as to why the same population of males who drool and masturbate to the idea of getting action with women is the same population that uses the word "pussy" as a synonym for weak, cowardly, or pathetic. Why would one pursue something they repeatedly demean? The mind, not the genitalia breed hesitation and fear. Ironic, I don't have testicles yet I am a hell of a lot more courageous than majority of males who like to credit themselves as men. Perhaps, one's outspokenness is not dependent upon the presence of balls? Maybe, maybe.

You belong with me simply because I say so and if you disagree you're the world's biggest asshole.

If the man in which you are seeking ignores or denies you, he is a giant asshole. Remember, if you like someone, do not respect their opinion. Actually, do not even allow them to make a decision on who to be with. You have decided somehow, despite the fact that you are not even together, you are somehow inherently better than that guy's girl. Yes, all cheerleaders are promiscuous.  For them not to be would be criminal. All women belong to one of two categories: virginal angel or devilish whore. Good girls bop their innocent blonde heads to the beat of their band instruments. Marks of the devil include red clothing, high heels, and pom-poms. Females should not get along because it's much more hip to fight over males instead. 

I am not done analyzing Taylor Swift's song lyrics. Moving on to "Love Story."

I have a vagina thus the best thing I could dream of being in life is a princess.

"You'll be the prince and I'll be the princess." Apparently having XX chromosomes means your one mission in life is to find your prince charming who'll grant you the opportunity to be a princess. From the historically inaccurate allusions to Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet, the crying female in duress to the anticipation surrounding Daddy's permission to wed, this tune found a way to cram every cliche fairy tale motif into one song. Props to my girl Taylor on that one. Despite her amazing ability to cram motifs, I'd have to say what T.Swift does best is encourage her fan-base, majority of which are impressionable youngings, to add new life to regressive gender roles put to rest decades ago. In just this song alone, the country star repeatedly presents male as the superior sex. With lyrics such as "My daddy said stay away from Juliet" (the use of the word "from" should also be noted, this line is directed at the male, fragile love struck Juliet can't be trusted to hold her own against the wrath of men!) and "I talked to your dad;go pick out a white dress" the father is clearly the final decision maker. As a girl she was submissive to her father, and as she progresses into womanhood, with her father's permission, she may now be submissive to her Prince Charming. Congrats on your engagement, girl!

Personally, robbing people of their freedom to listen to whatever musician they damn well please isn't my style. Understanding the social implications perpetuated by the musicians you choose to listen to? Yeah, that is my style. 

Hipster.

If "hipster" means wearing platforms, listening to music outside of the Billboard Hot 100, not viewing news as restricted to the confines of America, or being naive enough to believe that the world is capable of change, than yes, I am a hipster, and damn fucking proud. If being a vegan feminist who recycles and has a fondness for black glittery nail polish who crafts stellar DIY denim shorts, than fuck yeah, I'm a hipster.

Have the young people of this country already let society strip them so clean of individuality that artsy & thrifty humanitarians are demeaned? Since when is the word "artsy" an insult? Why should one avoid admitting fancy towards a certain style or musician in order to avoid being labeled as a "hipster."

The term spills out of the jealous mouths of those pissed members of society who don't have the confidence to wear ripped tights and combat boots through the halls of their high school. I think it is used by that girl in your advanced art class, when your sculpture wins 1st place, and her cinches 2nd. Vegetarians, who are not committed enough to become vegans, thrust the term upon their more devoted counterparts. It's excreted from the mouths of the non-opinionated, confidence lacking, dull, and unadventurous.

What does "hipster" really mean then? That I knew about Kony before he was dead/starving in a forest somewhere? Is it a lifestyle? That is, do your viewpoints and points of interest make you a hipster, or is it all just an image? Is your hipster status reliant on the contents of your latest Apple product, Starbucks cup, and closet? Or, is it your aspirations and religious practices that grant you such an honor?

I understand some people pretend to be knowledgeable or care about things just for a desired image, but the "hipster" is unprecedented. Why are creatively talented progressive thinkers being slandered? The term perpetuates conservatism and conformity, stomping on equality, individuality, and freedom along the way.

The term was established on a foundation of fear.

Defining Vagina.

As I was snooping around an old binder from my freshmen required health course, I came across a highly worrisome worksheet. This peculiar worksheet required students to match prewritten definitions to their corresponding sexual reproductive organ. The vagina was defined as "the organ in which the penis penetrates during sex." Firstly, on a purely biological stance, this definition completely ignores the fact that the vagina is a self-cleansing muscle, or it's oh so important role in childbirth. Equally disturbing are the social implications of this definition. Although I sadly acknowledge that addressing homosexual intercourse in a conservative town's high school may be out of the question, sex, when in relation to the vagina, must be identified as “intravaginal”. How can a school teach oral sex and anal sex as forms of sex, yet then define sex as the penile penetration of the vagina? Overall, this sexist definition implies that the vagina's only purpose and function is to be penetrated by the male penis. And we wonder why Americans are so ignorant about sexual health? Say it with me now: SEXUAL EDUCATION REFORM NOW!

So be concerned.

It was free, so I took all I could. The world is such a lovely place behind those dope tinted glasses. Always had a thing for assholes, haven’t you? Particularly ones who are well read & well traveled, someone’s who’s long fingers play pretty notes from keys or a series of strings.

It’s a stay strong and I love you. It’s what we need and other truths I now find irrelevant. Don’t you see, we can get out and that we are the lucky ones? Whatever whatever.  

Worth it.

I wholeheartedly believe it would be worth the risk of going to prison and forever tarnishing my reputation in order to host sadomasochistic sex sessions under the disguise of a Christian summer camp. No, S&M doesn't turn me on, but corrupting young Christian children would.

The recipe for equality calls for boys to embrace what was once exclusively "girl stuff."

Until boyfriends stop squirming when their girlfriends ask them to hold their purse, fathers stop freaking when their daughters mention their menstruation cycles, and sons stop rolling their eyes when their mothers stop in the make-up aisle, true equality will not exist. This is why males buy their significant others roses and get down on one knee with diamond rings. These images are not romantic; they’re predictable impersonal clichés. Roses and diamonds have somehow become the only jewels and flowers that men can comfortably admit the names to. Females have been exploring what was once exclusively male for decades (everything from careers to clothing options). So males, what is the hold up? If I, as a woman, can romp around in your dress shirt and join my high school’s football team (not to mention, being considered sexy or a boss for doing so) than why can’t you borrow my glittery socks and take dance classes? When we define ourselves with a political party, lifestyle, religion it is a conscious choice. I ask you to acknowledge that gender is no different.

“Male pride is not really about pride, it’s about fear of being viewed as feminine.” –Julia Serano

Yahoo News teams up with Allure to present one warped vision of beauty.

Yahoo news has featured an article on their homepage titled "Beauty mistakes that turn men off." So, if something isn't appealing to men, is it a mistake? Do women actually read this and alter their beauty routine/preferences?

Among things apparently unappealing to men are overdone eyelashes, a sloppy shave, stiff hair, smoky-eye overload, and bold lipstick/manicures. I suppose Taylor Momsen will be forever alone, aye? Frequently used adjectives include sexy, innocent, subtle, and natural. Want to know what’s natural? Hairy legs. This article associates stiff hair as being unapproachable. These “high-maintenance” looks symbolize work, business, and success. What man would want to be reminded that gasp, women have brains and careers!?

Explicitly stating "Guys like [women] to keep things pretty simple" women are not be experimental or mysterious, yet to remain classic and predictable instead. Yahoo presents only one image of beauty and dismisses all others. What if your personal style isn’t predictable boring bimbo or Zooey Deschanel 1940’s wannabe? What if you’re a risk-taker or a little on the edgy side? Everyday women must not be curious or trendy, leave that to celebrities and rock stars, duh. Remember ladies, you must avoid anything unappealing to men; women should not do what makes them feel beautiful, but what men view as beautiful.

Personal favorite quote: “If your manicure is black, glittery, glows in the dark, or is any combination thereof, men are intimidated. Or just kind of freaked out.”

Form your own opinion: http://shopping.yahoo.com/news/beauty-mistakes-turn-men-off-000000659.html